And no I didn't plan on it..trust me.

Arg..I don't get it. I keep telling myself over and over I don't care about her, don't give a shit what she does. But here I just see her for a few seconds as she drives by infront of me. And my heart goes all goofy, beating a million miles a minute. My arms were literally shaking as I had to mail off a few CD's for the e: tree I'm in. My legs could barely hold me up. And all I could think about was where was she? what was she doing here at the shopping center by my house?

Then it hit me. AT least I knew why she was here with their van. She was going to pick up her dad. He commutes ya see and the van picks/drops him off at a Giant food store right near me.

So here's how it happened.

I got out of my car picked up my CD's and started to head towards the post office thingy. When suddenly driving infront of me I see her unmistakable red hair and their van. I do an almost double take as I follow it down the road. Only saving grace was that I had on my sunglasses so if she was looking at me, she had sunglasses on too, I couldn't tell nor could she tell that I was following here. So, shaken up, I head into the mail office thing and mail off my packages.

When I get out of the store I know where the van is parked and i have to drive down in her direction cause I need to drop off the Fight Club DVD at blockbuster. So i head over there and try to catch a glimpse of her in the car but no good..I can't see anyone inside. So I'm like "What the?!" I know she has to either be in the car or some shop near the car. But I know she's not in the starbucks or the mcdonalds. So I think she may be in Blockbuster. I go in..drop off the DVD's and sorta take a quick look over the store. Don't see her. So I go out and get back in my car..purpoesly pulling out of my spot so I can make a semi-big loop and drive behind her car, hoping to see where'n the hell she is. And all I can see in the drivers side is her arm...so...

I pull out of the shopping center and drive a way that'll take me infront of where she's parked. Only thing that there's a little hill area that blocks off most of the view of the shopping center parking lot. But I can see the top of her van, but I can't make out her inside. So now I'm thinking she saw me, both times, when I was walking and when i was driving behind her and purposly either hid, or whatever to spy on me w/o being seen.

Oh and another thing, I know she had to have seen me, cause well two or three things.

1) My car is unmistakable. It's the only lightblue VW passat wagon with a ton of stickers on it's tail. And I know she knows what most of the stickers are.

2) I was wearing a shirt that I know she'd recogonize. I love this little orange and white old navy shirt like anything. And i know she'd remember it cause my mom used to tease me all the time when I'd go out with Erin with it on.

3) I was two-three feet away from her!#@!

So..

Now help me out.

Some of you have read the Erin saga. Some haven't. But for those of you who have, and know what I've said about her other times.

Do you guys think I still care either a little/deeply/or madly about her, based on my reaction to just barely seeing her today?

Help me out..please..now'm so confused as to why someone who I supposedly (or so I tell myself) am over, can turn me into a blathering idiot in a mere matter of seconds.