Remember how I first started to talk to Erin because I saw scars on her wrists? Check the first part of the story incase you missed it.

Anyways Erin would cut herself. Because in her opinion it was 'punishment' for being a "bad child".

Which was total and utter bullshit. Erin thought her parents saw her as a terrible child and that she was horrible.

She was far from it..she'd help out with chores and what not. Of course like any teenager she'd bitch about 'em....and her dad would get pissed and yell at her.

Nothing out of the normal right?

No nothing out of the normal.

But Erin had to blow it out of porpotion. And her way of doing it was self-mutalation.

She would try to cut her wrists with a goddamn metal fucking ruler. Not a knife..no no..a metal fucking ruler.

Of course this wouldn't actualy harm her..or at least nothing serious. But it'd mark up her wrist good.

And of course I'd see it.

And being the concerned boyfriend that I am..and just coming off a friend committing suicide I would promptly spaz.

It kept blowing my mind as to why in the hell Erin would do this..every single goddamn time she did it..it'd blow me away as to why.

She did this off and on during our relationship.

Eventually I saw a pattern to it. Every time I would start to focus on school work and/or getting into college she'd cut herself. And instantly I was at her beck and call again.

Repeat for a good 4 months.

Finally I could take it no more..I couldn't stand wondering if she did it..or if she went even further and used a real knife.

And that was prolly the second reason I had to end it with Erin. I just could't take my stomach to do the twists and turns every time she did that..and I sure as shit wasn't going to be jerked around while I was trying to get my ass into college.

So now you can go and read part 7 and understand why I had to leave the relationship even if it tore at my heart and everything I was.

]:-scud-:[