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"..i'm sad" @ 06.26.02
a weird thing happened tonight.

my friend stood up for me.

yea i know you're saying "if he's your friend he should always stand up for you" but sadly it doesn't happen that way. i have no idea why, but because i'm me it somehow signifies that it's ok for everyone to pick on everything i do.

case in point tonight, i was the dd and so had to drive everyone, but everythign i did got some comment. i shifted "angry", however that is. anytime i took a turn going faster then 10 mph i got a comment.

finally as we're leaving the place with most of the other guys pretty drunk, and me totally sober, they start it up again and finally ian's like "shut the fuck up you guys, he's driving just leave'm alone you fucks" which sort of suprised me, because whenever i say something like that, people act as if i was a mute or something.

but because ian said it they actually listened and i was almost amazed..then to boot when i dropped him off at his house he said "sorry about that earlier, i should've said something before i did. i was an asshole..my bad" to which was even more of a shock but i told him it was alright and i was used to it.

an interesting, but sad [that it's interesting, as shouldn't it be par?] thing that happened.

and that's basically my entire day. 4 hours spent in some semi-decent bar, was the only thing i did all damned day. god i'm sad.

scud

ps. yea this is just a phase of feeling shitty. so don't worry, i know eventually i'll pull my stupid ass out of it.

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