these past two weeks have been weird, because ever since i got back from spring break i don't think i've gone to my chem class. i think maybe because i've realized the prof [a really old guy with bad hearing] is silly and not really teaching us much.

..i dunno i just keep getting the feeling what's happened to me the past two years is happening again, and i don't want it to. i want to be able to finish a full year of school and not fuck myself over. but yet i'm not sure why this seems to happen...maybe i do need someone like kb kicking my ass every day if i don't go to class, or at least making me feel bad for not going. but sadly i think she has decided she wants to not be anywhere near me anymore since well. i don't hear from her, cept for maybe "hi. oh yea, cool. well i hafta go. bye." which is sort of sad, but what the hell did i expect, she is a redhead afterall.

or maybe it could be the fact i'm tired of feeling 'eh' or well not feeling anything and want to feel happy for whatever reason, who knows.

scud